Friday, 25 November 2011

Premonition

Here is our project, by me and Charlotte Patterson :) (Storyboards, evaluation etc coming soon)

1 comment:

  1. 0:00 - I rather like the opening shot, although it's very "Blair Witch". It's very brave to start with a zoom out and I think it kind of works, although it's always hard to make it look natural and not an auto-zoom. I would use this sparingly, though

    0:11 - Your camerawork is a little shakey, although this may be deliberate. I'm not keen on the framing of this second shot - the mise-en-scene is somewhat messy and it's a little hard to follow. I would have used a long shot so you could get the full effect of the guy rising

    0:15 - The continuity of the fight does not seem to work - although I appreciate that the action is running backwards, you seem to jum quite dramatically. Not sure what the guy at the left hand side of the screen is doing...?

    0:20 - I quite like the way you've framed this; you're maintaining 180 although I think it's a shame Sean's head is out of shot

    0:23 - Good reverse; you maintain 180 and have a decent eyeline match. Good use of Over The Shoulder

    0:24 - Slight continuity error here in that you have Sean in place in front of the victim in the previous shot; in this shot he is moving towards the victim. Ideally, the previous shot would have finished the move started here. You end up with a slight jump-cut which does not really make sense in the context here. You've done well with the camera to keep it still, mind. I like the composition at 0:27 with the high-angle 2-shot

    0:31 - again, a continuity error with regard to Sean's positioning. He was to the left of the victim and now he is in front of him. You need to make sure you clearly consider the geography of your scenes - exactly where is your character located? How does his position relate to those of the other characters?

    0:35 - The footage is a little dark here and the use of CU is confusing - it is hard to make out what is going on. The music is effective, by the way. The pan is reasonable although I would have framed it slightly more in long shot. I'm not sure how the shot at 0:36 matches with the previous one.

    Your titles are okay, although you need to really match the timings of the captions more (the last couple pop out a little too quickly)

    This is an atmospheric piece and you have used black and white, contrast and music well to create mood (although as mentioned it is possibly a little too dark). You need to work both on framing and continuity, as these are clearly weaker. You need to make sure that your storyboards are clear and that you consider continuity and editing when you shoot. You also need to consider the composition of your shots in order to make sure that you are not confusing that audience. This piece is on the cusp of L2/3 due to some imaginative ideas which are limited in effectiveness by the weaker continuity and (on occasion) framing.

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